I feel like I've been having a hard time all semester long..with everything. School, volleyball, my job, my living situation, keeping in touch with friends, family. Everything is just so much I feel like I'm behind in everything and that other things are being neglected.
To start things off, I feel like I should be living on my own. Now, I say this, but I technically live "on my own" but I have an apartment with a friend. I'm a very neat freak person. When I put something somewhere, I know if it's been moved an inch. I hate dirtiness especially in a kitchen or bathroom. A bedroom is less of a stress for me to see because it's not a common ground territory that everyone has to see. It's yours. I know I have my moments when I don't clean something up, but I feel like my mess is minimal. I hate coming home to puppies running all over the house, shoes everything, potty everywhere, no food or water in their bowls, etc. and that's just with the dogs. I don't know how many times I've done dishes within the past couple months, but my roommates dishes from about a month and a half ago are STILL sitting on the counter dirty. He hasn't taken out the trash in the past 5 times. I just feel so dirty!!! I've nonchalantly brought the situations up but he shrugs it off an blames stuff on me..
Like early tonight. I went home for the weekend because I didn't have to work and my mom was having a bonfire for people she used to work with. These people have known me since my mother was pregnant with me. Of course I'm going to go. Early that day, I went to watch my friend play her volleyball game. My niece stayed the night that night so I decided I'd stay too. My roommate had to work this same day and I understand that. So of course the dogs are in their kennel because if they're not, they'll tear up the apartment. BUT instead of coming home from work and letting them out/feeding them/playing with them..he decided to go out and party. Instead, the dogs were locked in their kennel for almost 24 hours.
I just don't know what to do anymore..I'm so unhappy with my living situation. If I move out, I'd have to move and live by myself which I wouldn't mind at all an I get to keep my dog.or I can move back home and have most everything (food and essentials) paid for with no rent, electricity and water to worry about..but I'd have to get rid of my pup :(
I feel like I need anger management..
One of my best friends that I've made at University said she may go home which is 5 hours from here..I can't lose her in the midst of all of this too..I just feel so alone in such a crowded place.
